Only herpes only dating
I never worked up the courage to tell my family and friends about the diagnosis. I have had a couple of meaningful relationships with women who “also” had it. But, I never actually even attempted to date a non-infected person.
I just couldn’t handle the possible shame and rejection. Years laters I went to a new physician who insisted I take the blood test before he would renew my Valtrex prescription.
A lot of us get very fearful when speaking about sex.
As an OBGYN and as a person who is herpes-positive, I think it is really important to talk to your partner before [sex] and say, 'I wanna make sure you are OK with this because I don't want to jeopardize your health.'"The next steps that you should take to keep you and your partner healthy include the use of condoms and medication. Loanzon explains that they are only 96 percent effective, not 100 percent.
The virus is not only passed by a person with an outbreak and evident ulcers. Loanzon and most people who have the virus, one of the most difficult parts of navigating the diagnosis is learning how to divulge your status to a new partner or love interest.
"People can just have viral shedding and not even know about it, and that's how it is getting passed along," says Dr. Herpes is treated by our society and by our popular culture as one of the worst things that can happen to a sexually active person; if you have the virus, it is a sign that you are "tarnished" and will struggle to find love.
She has already heard from many readers who see themselves in her story: "We're all having the same experience, yet nobody is talking about it. [If] you ended up [getting] herpes, we can choose to grow from it or we can crumble underneath the diagnosis," she says.
Herpes is treated as a punchline in countless American comedies: the worst, most embarrassing thing that can happen to somebody when they have sex — a scarlet letter forever branding you for some horrible decision that you made, preventing you from ever finding love or engaging in sex ever again.Loanzon contracted Type 1, and some people contract Type 1 without performing any sexual behavior at all.I have at least two friends who got oral herpes before they were 10 years old because they shared a drinking glass with an older relative who wasn't aware that they had the virus. He looked at the rash and instantly said, “yup that looks like herpes to me and I’ve seen lots of cases”. And I have the unique distinction of having lived for several years with misdiagnosed HSV2 and have dated and been (intensely) sexually involved with herpes infected partners. When the rash recurred I rushed to see my personal physician.